sea change

fjords (norway) by irana (have you also seen her cups? amazing!)

for months now i've been feeling a change inside, a restless wish that goes back to those words i first quoted at the beginning of the new year, a desire to live content with small means....

i understand now that i must first to go to a wellspring of my own, to listen to that little inner eight-ball, that voice inside that says, go, now... go!*  these last few months i've realized i want to only live what i love, to gather my choices so that my life feels as smooth and fine as a small grey stone held lightly in my pocket.

and once i made that decision, at every corner, something new would appear that fit so well with what was unfolding. with what i was creating. ripple after ripple of happenstance - it all seemed to say, yes, yes, this is the way...

so tomorrow we move to a new old house, a little cottage bungalow near lake country. everything is packed up in boxes. the cats are chasing each other up and down the apartment and our voices echo in the open rooms. it's late but i'm excited... and sleep will come.

it seems hard at first, but once you let go, it feels so much better not to wait for some future perfect to do the things you love.

lately i've been wandering online, and i find myself in love with the translations for japanese sites - the word order is often reversed but somehow conveys a meaning more true: where living and art is a world of one continuation... art the life which lives...

it's raining and thundering here right now and there's a cool breeze coming through the night windows.

and i shiver, not because i'm cold but because this was exactly what i was hoping for.

good night ;)
xo

p.s. one more translation:

so far, it might be,
those which you can think that we want truly, were completed.

* yes, my so-called life, yes ;)

Comments

[shari]

such an amazing post. your descriptions, your thoughts, the rain. i love it all. congrats on your new house. looking forward to hearing more about it. xoxo

[pink.scarf]

A post!...and a lovely one at that :) I wish you all the best in your move Jerusha, can't wait to hear all about your new house and surroundings.

katie

[C]

wow, your posts are few and far between but when they come they're worth it! (not a complaint by the way)...yes, that restless wish - you've inspired me to make the decision I need to! I think! Scary!

[Marieke]

That is so lovely put Jerusha! I hope the move went smoothly.

[gracia]

Best of luck with the move... and with finding oneself in amusing and poetic Japanese translations.
see you, g

[emma]

You post so rarely... but it doesn't matter so much since I come here from time to time to check and each post is good to read several times...

I feel the change coming too.

[colorsonmymind]

great wisdom

[madi]

MY SO-CALLED LIFE.. amazing.
good luck with everything.
you have beautiful writing.

madi

[isabelle]

when will we get a new post ?
waiting forward to it !

[samantha]

so lovely.